Name: Bob the Bong
Occupation: Semi-Pro Basketball Player
Team: Parha-Fernalia “4:20ers”
Family: Vicky the Vaporizer (Wife), Harry the Hookah (son), Uncle Jerry the Joint (Uncle)
Name: Vicky the Vaporizer
Occupation: Housewife & homeschool teacher
Former Occupation: Psychic to the stars
Addicted to: Home shopping channels, shopping at superstores like Bullseye’s, KutKosters, Floormart, and the new THC Mega-Ultra-Superstore
Name: Harry the Hookah
Occupation: Homeschool student
Known For: Being the “handy-capable” son of Bob the Bong and Vicky the Vaporizer
Little Known Fact: Really has an IQ of 168
Name: Lil’ Petey the Pipey
Occupation: House Pet/Guard
Previous Occupation: Companion animal for the criminally insane
Known For: Viciously attacking the mailman who is never able to the deliver mail to Bob the Bong
Page 2
Name: Uncle Jerry the Joint
Occupation: Inventor & Founder of Parha-Fernalia
Known For: Freeing the P.O.W.’s of the War on Drugs, Creating “4:20 Time!”
Favorite Scientist: Bluntjamin Franklin
Name: Blaargh!
Occupation: Unknown
Species: Unknown
Gender: Unknown
Affiliated With: SNORE™ the Computer Game
Name: Stanley the Steamroller
Occupation: Landlord & upstairs neighbor to Bob the Bong
Known For: Flattening people that piss him off (which is everyone)
Country of Origin: Uzi-Bekistan
Name: Sheriff Sprinkle Donut
Occupation: Town Sheriff
Relatives: Mother Bearclaw, Jelly Donut (Deputy), Glazed Donut (Deputy), Creme-Filled Donut (Deputy)
Partner: Hamlet the Drug-Sniffing Pig (XXIV)
Page 3
Name: Billy the Beer
Occupation: ΩΩΩ Fraternity Brother
In Charge Of: Bullying Unsuspecting passerby’s into rushing the ΩΩΩ fraternity
Highest Grade Level Completed: Kindergarten
Name: Seth the Shotglass
Occupation: Head of ΩΩΩ fraternity
Known For: Ornery disposition to anyone and everyone
Schools Affiliated With: None
Schools Banned From: 761
Name: Corocco the Cigarette
Occupation: 24/7 Convenience store clerk/owner
Former Occupation: Top-rated brain surgeon in his native country of Pakistandia. Nobel Prize winner.
Relatives: Conchita the Cuban Cigar (wife), 17 little butts named No. 1 - No. 17 (kids)
Name: Homeless Hector the Dirty Heroin Needle
Occupation: Town bum & panhandler
Previous Occupation: “We-It Bomb War” Veteran
Known For: Waking up in random places in puddles of his own urine and drool
Page 4
Name: Cleon the Crackpipe
Occupation: Town Thief & Pizza Deliveryboy
Previous Occupation: Miniature convenience store rose trapped in a small glass cylinder
First Stole: His umbillical cord & mother’s afterbirth
Name: Connie the Cokestraw
Occupation: Town Whore & Babysitter
Previous Occupation: Micky-J’s Milkshake Straw
Favorite Actress: Droolia Bobberts (from “Skanky Woman”)
Name: The Great Crack Rock In The Sky
Occupation: Hallucinatory Deity & Imaginary King Pimp
Previous Occupation: Baking soda left in rental apartment from 1969 until 1999
Name: Ernie the Empty Baggie
Occupation: Day laborer & Panhandler
Former Occupation: Stash baggie for the Notorious I.U.D.
Known For: Selling oranges, chicklets and other assorted items on the side of the road
